My little buddy

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Family - What The F*%# Is Wrong With Them?

I should preface this by saying that 1) this is a really long post and 2)there are two Ted's and two Mary's in this story. Ted B is my mother's boyfriend, Ted W is my mother's younger brother. Mary M is my dad's sister from Dover and Mary G is my mum's sister.

So, as many of you know, my mother's 60th birthday party is tonight. Her actual birthday is October 3rd, but we are having the party tonight. Originally we had intended to throw it October 6th. However my mum's sister, Katherine and her hubby, Danny are here on vacation from Victoria until October 4th, so Amanda and I decided to have the party this weekend so they could be here for it. We thought we were being thoughtful. We thought we were being nice.

Then there's the other thing. The surprise! Some of you know what it is. My dad's sisters are coming up from Dover, NH for the party. They left this morning and will arrive shortly. Mum doesn't have a clue! They wanted it to be a surprise, so we went with it. She's going to be shocked! Specially since Mary M (the aunt Nick, Kris, Tori and I stayed with in August) is coming. She hasn't been here since my father's funeral oh, 19 years ago. But it was mum's 60th birthday and they wanted to do it ... even though they will have to turn around and drive home tomorrow. We still don't know when they are leaving tomorrow ... we're hoping later in the day so we can visit with them. Again, we thought we were being thoughtful and nice.

But we were wrong. At least from Katherine's point of view.

You see, three days ago Mum informs me that she has to drive my grandmother and Katherine and Danny down from North Tay for the party ... it was Mum's week up with my Grammy, so she was up there anyway. That's not the bad part. The bad part was when I realized that she would have to drive them back to North Tay after the party. Well, that put a crimp in our plan for her to spend part of the day with the in-laws. So I enlisted my Aunt Mary G's help (the other Aunt Mary - my mum's sister). I asked her to have Grammy, Katherine and Danny stay the night at her house Saturday night after the party so Mum wouldn't have to drive them back. So off Mary goes and convinces them to stay the night. Great! Mission accomplished!

THEN two days ago, my mother informs me that she and her boyfriend Ted B(who isn't coming to the party - asshole - but that's another matter), Katherine and Danny all plan on going to Millville for a crib tournament Sunday morning. And they're leaving bright and early so they can have breakfast in Millville before the tournament. Hmmm ... wooooooondeeeeeerful! I told Mum she shouldn't have done that, that I had plans for her that day. I didn't want to tell her the reason and spoil the surprise! Anyway, we haven't said anything to her. It's still a surprise.

But here comes the part where Amanda and I were NOT being thoughtful and nice. Mum came home to get ready for the party here at the house this afternoon. My Aunt Joan is going to drive everybody down from North Tay this evening. The plan is for Mum to drive Grammy, Katherine and Danny back, while Joanie drives Ted W (Mum's brother) back. But Joanie is prepared to take everybody back if Mum decides to stay in town tonight. Thank you, thank you Joanie! She's a lifesaver. I called Katherine this afternoon to give her the heads up about tomorrow, so she won't be left in the lurch at the very last minute. That the sisters are coming up today and it's a surprise. That Mum may decide to stay home tomorrow morning instead of going to crib so she can spend some time with the sisters before they leave.

And that's when she lights into me. And I seriously didn't know what to say to her. I was floored at her unbelievable selfishness and bitchiness. Seriously, her tone was nasty.

Her responses:

~Well, it would have been more appropriate and thoughtful if you and your sister had seen fit to tell your mother about the sisters coming up a few days ago. I sit there thinking: Excuse me? THAT WOULD HAVE RUINED THE SURPRISE, DIPSHIT!

~Well, someone's going to end up being disappointed because your mother wants to go to the crib tournament. She's going to be upset that she is expected to miss it. So I say - well, we'll see what happens. She may decide to go anyway. But she may also decide to stay in town to spend a few hours with the sisters tomorrow, since she rarely sees them. It's up to Mum, it's her decision.

~Ted B's going to be upset because he'll be down a partner. What's he going to do? I'm thining: Find another?! You can't walk two feet without tripping over a crib lover in the Stanley area.

(By the way, I should mention that Amanda and I haven't told Ted B about the sisters coming. At first, it was because he would use it as an excuse not to come to the party. But I guess we were giving him too much credit. We thought he would be a little more considerate since it's Mum's birthday party and actually come. But we were wrong. Now we haven't told him because if we tell him why he may need to find another partner, he will call Mum and bitch and ruin the surprise. The man may be in his eighties, but he acts like a spoiled rotten child of 12.)

~Well, your mother is driving Ted, Danny and I to Millville. This really puts us on the spot. If she doesn't go, we won't have a drive. I think to myself: Well, why don't you borrow someone's car for the day? But I tell her that it isn't written in stone that Mum won't be going, but be prepared just in case!

~Well, we're really looking forward to crib tomorrow. Because tomorrow is Millville we didn't go to crib in Cross Creek today. I'm thinking: That's your own damn fault, not mine! What do you expect me to do? Turn back time so you can go the tournament today in CC? But I say nothing because if I do, I will be spewing hateful words at her for her selfishness.

And on and on she goes. I simply bit my tongue (seriously it's almost bitten off - I may end up being mute) and listen to her bitch. Then I say - well, I just wanted to bring you up to speed so you will know that plans may change tomorrow and you might want to make arrangements now. Bye! And I hung up.

You might ask why Amanda and I didn't tell Katherine and Danny about the sisters coming up days ago. The reason is simple. They are both alcoholics. And when Katherine is home, around Grammy, she drinks more. And says even more. She would have given up the secret in a heartbeat. I never meant this to ruin any of their plans for their vacation. That wasn't the intention.

BUT GOD DAMN IT! This is my mother's 60th birthday party! Suck it up bitch!

I haven't told Mary G about my conversation with Katherine or she might take a strip off Katherine. She and Katherine frequently butt heads and she wouldn't hesitate to tell Kahterine what a bitch she's being. Also I am extremely grateful to Mary G for being willing to have Katherine and Danny stay the night tonight despite the aforementioned headbutting. Why did she agree to do such a selfless thing? Oh yeah! BECAUSE IT'S MY MOTHER's 60TH BIRTHDAY PARTY!

I told my sister that I probably wouldn't drink much. She says - oh I have lots of coolers. I told her that's not the problem! Katherine will be loaded and will probably be flapping at the gums. If I drink, I may be tempted to tell her off. At least if I'm sober, I will have the presence of mind to drag her to the bathroom before kicking her ass and telling her off.

I just have one question: What the fuck is wrong with family!?!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

As of Thursday Morning

Tuesday

Law & Order: SVU - was very good. Cynthia Nixon (Sex In The City) guest starred ... a few twists to the story made it interesting, where normally I find DID stories boring, overdone.
NCIS - was great, as usual. I actually shed a tear when my fave character died ... I kept telling myself that he couldn't be dead, it was all a mistake .... when I finally accepted it, I had to cry. Tony's my favourite character because A) he's a hottie and B) he compares everything to movies; a real movie buff.(Where the hell is this guy in real life? He's my dream man!) Oh, and it turns out he wasn't dead ... it was a case of mistaken identity.
House - Poor House is lost without his team. What will he do? Get another to torture, I guess. But not to worry, Foreman, Chase and Cameron should be back at some point since they are still in the credits and are still on the show website. I was worried last night ... I really don't want Chase to go ... he's such a cutie! (which is odd since I generally don't find blond men very attractive).
Cane - Did anybody watch it? The first thing Hector Elizondo says is "Give me a mojito, please." I got a chuckle out of that. Made me think of the Princess. Anyway, the show was good. The eye candy is amazing. The music is great. Very Cuban.
DWTS - Still haven't watched it ... waiting to tape the Results show, then I will watch the whole 4 hours. YES, 4 HOURS. Give me a break! They don't need that much time.


Wednesday

Criminal Minds - What the hell?!?!?! They cannot end the epi that way!!!! And it's truuuuueeee! It's not a mistake! He's gone!!! What are they going to do without his wisdom? Arrgghhh! You can't come back from suicide! How could they ever write him back in?
CSI:NY - They changed the theme song! Well, it's still The Who's 'Baba O'Reilly', but it's remixed! Love it! So much more upbeat and contemporary. The plot was tried and true, but I always enjoy watching Gary Sinise.
Back To You - Was hilarious again! I laughed that can't-stop-even-if-you-wanted-to laugh, that constant giggle that will end up making your cheeks hurt. It's not just the writing, but the way Kelsey Grammar delivers a line.
Bionic Woman - I was so intent on watching Private Practice that I missed taping the first ten minutes. However, what I did see was good. I wasn't impressed that they changed casting on two characters though - I guess bland is better. They really overuse the "bionic sound", but other than that, it has definite potential. Word of warning to those who haven't watched it yet ... it's much "darker" than the 70's version. I guess it's a sign of the times, right?
Private Practice - I liked it. It's not Grey's, ok? So many people keep saying it's just not as good, or they're disappointed. But people, it's not Grey's! You can't expect the show to be the same ... otherwise they would have just made Grey's two hours long. It's different, it's its own flavour. And I like it. I think once this cast has worked together for a while, we will see a definite improvement. At the end, when Cooper and Violet were talking to Violet's patient ... that was Shonda. You can see it, you can hear it. And that's what this show needs more of.
Dirty Sexy Money - Didn't end up watching it ... I am going to wait until Sunday, when it airs on CTV.
Life - Hadn't initially intended to watch it. However ... the premise is interesting - a cop imprisoned for a crime he didn't committ, then released and back on the police force again. Each week is a different case, all the while he works on solving his own. I felt I needed to watch it in case it became the biggest new show and I had missed it. I gotta say ... it moves pretty slow. At one point, I sat there thinking - this is the stupidest show I have ever seen! - but the main character is so fucking weird! it makes it interesting. He's a cross between Rain Man and Mickey O'Neil in Snatch(Brad Pitt's character). I just don't know about this show.

PrittyKitty

That picture to the right. That one with the sassy kitty in pink and pearls.

That's my t-shirt.

Yes, folks, I have a prittykitty t-shirt!

I'm getting to be as bad as Princess.

Wait. What am I saying? Nobody is as bad as Princess!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

As of Tuesday Morning

Ok, so this is what I have so far:

Sunday
Cold Case - didn't end up watching it ... I've slowly been drifting away since as I find the lead actress more than mildly annoying. It's mainly her hair - weird I know - but I wish she'd dump the 90's version of a mullet - it's aweful!
Shark - Awesome as usual ... they've introduced a new recurring villain - a Russian mob boss - played by Arnold Vosloo (Imhotep from The Mummy). Love him! Should make for an interesting season.

Monday
CSI:Miami - Same old same old ... but the cutie DEA agent is a regular now! Yummy! And Horatio has a son. But we all knew that from the ads ... definitely a recurring theme for future epis.
Chuck - it's a new Dramedy on NBC ... and FUNNY! I was pleasantly surprised ... I decided to watch it at the last minute after I saw Zachary Levi(Chuck) on The View yesterday and he was hilarious. There's an encore presentation on Saturday at 10pm, I believe.
Prison Break - watched the first half then flipped back to it on ads while watching:
The Big Bang Theory - Holy Crap! Funny! Two nerds sharing an apartment become friends with the beautiful girl across the hall. I thought I was socially retarded?!
Two and a Half Men - Hilarious, as usual! The casting director who put Charlie Sheen and Jon Cryer together was brilliant. These two make me pee-my-pants-laugh.
Journeyman- I wasn't really sure what to expect ... but I was surprised to find that I enjoyed it. I don't know if I will be a faithful watcher or not ... depends what the next few epis bring, I guess. The show is actually a lot like Sandra Bullock's Premonition.
K-ville - last night's epi was a definite improvement over last week. The assisstant DA from last year's Law & Order is now a cast member ... and she's as annoying as ever. But Cole Hauser more than makes up for that.
Dancing With The Stars - haven't watched it yet ... Monday night was all the women, Tuesday will be all the men. I will wait and watch both epis tomorrow while the kidlets nap.
Heroes - didn't watch it last night .... there were four shows on at 10 and I only have two VCRs ... I had to make an executive decision - what to ditch for now ... I picked Heroes since there's an encore presentation on Saturday night!

So that's it .... thank goodness for Canadian channels that air some of these shows at earlier times ... makes everything more do-able.

Tonight's schedule includes Cane, Law & Order: SVU, House, NCIS, and DWTS.